Practice Interview
You know, I tote myself as a "communications" person, but I am TERRIBLE at interviews.
Really, just awful.
And it's because I don't believe in myself. And that hurts to say. It does. And please, don't reply to this with words of encouragement, because it only pushes me down further. But I have low self-esteem, and it shows through in interviews.
When I am tasked with evaluating myself, I think back to my therapist telling me that I am my own worst critic. We were talking about social anxiety, or, rather, he was telling me I have social anxiety. To which I replied, "No I don't. I don't care what people think about me. I haven't, ever since I was bullied in middle school. It's one of the things that has made me into the person I am today."
To which he replied, "That may be true that you don't care about what people think. But I can tell that that hasn't stopped you from thinking about what they think about you all the time. You can't stop thinking about how you are perceived. And the only reason you don't care about what they think is because no matter what they say or think about you, it will never be worse than the things you have said about yourself in your own head. You are your harshest critic. And no one is meaner to you than you are to yourself."
Okay, the conversation didn't go EXACTLY like that, but he did say all those things. Maybe over multiple sessions, maybe in the same session, I don't know. But he said them. And I'll never forget them. Because it was the moment I realized that I have never stopped doubting myself. Never stopped second-guessing every interaction, every decision I've ever made. It is the reason I push myself. Because I am not good enough for me. I'm not enough for the version of myself in my head. I'm not cool enough. Not successful enough. Not enough.
I took a practice interview. I'm honestly too scared to take a "scheduled" interview where it gives you feedback. I can't be "on" when the stakes aren't there. When there isn't a real person in front of me that I can play off of. I need that energy to see if they like what I am saying, to be sure that they like me. Most of the time in interviews I try to make some connection with the person I'm interviewing with so that they remember me. I comment on their t-shirt, talk about something in pop culture, anything to give them a hook. So that they don't remember me as "that nervous guy" but as the "game of thrones" guy.
That's probably a terrible tactic. But it's what I've got.
Frankly I need the practice. I need to take that little test.
Anyway, you asked for feedback:
For the resume part - I found the feedback repetitive. It took all the dashes I used and told me to change them all and so I had like 7 points of feedback that were all exactly the same. Aggregating those into one piece of feedback would be nice.
- The portal felt small, like there was too much information on the screen. You had a picture of my resume on one side, and then a list of changes to make on the other. Why not walk me through the resume and lead me to the changes? Point to them on the document. Have each one be a little dot or circle that I can click through and it shows them to me as I click on them instead of a list. Obviously the AI knows exactly where each change needs to be made. Make it more animated instead of a list. My brain doesn't want to try to make those connections. Make the machine do it.
The interview part:
- I didn't do the version where I got feedback, so I haven't had the full experience. But the practice questions were difficult. They felt real and I had zero idea how to answer, so in that sense it felt exactly like a real interview. What IS my greatest accomplishment? I know I said something, but I honestly have no idea. I guess I should figure it out. I wanted to say marrying my wife, but that sounded cliche. I didn't want the machine to judge me. Is that weird? I felt like some nerdy dude was going to read the transcript afterwards and then email me saying "marrying your wife? Really? That's all you've done with your life? What a loser." Even though I don't think I'm a loser. I was worried someone would think I was a loser. I don't know how that helps. But maybe telling people that no one will read the transcript. Even if its a lie. Just lie to me. Maybe. That's one person's opinion.
Overall I felt like the service was great. It worked well, and provided some actionable changes to my resume. I might not make them, but it was good to get the feedback for options for changes. This way I don't have to bother a mentor or a friend. I can just use a machine. Really helpful. Thanks!
Really, just awful.
And it's because I don't believe in myself. And that hurts to say. It does. And please, don't reply to this with words of encouragement, because it only pushes me down further. But I have low self-esteem, and it shows through in interviews.
When I am tasked with evaluating myself, I think back to my therapist telling me that I am my own worst critic. We were talking about social anxiety, or, rather, he was telling me I have social anxiety. To which I replied, "No I don't. I don't care what people think about me. I haven't, ever since I was bullied in middle school. It's one of the things that has made me into the person I am today."
To which he replied, "That may be true that you don't care about what people think. But I can tell that that hasn't stopped you from thinking about what they think about you all the time. You can't stop thinking about how you are perceived. And the only reason you don't care about what they think is because no matter what they say or think about you, it will never be worse than the things you have said about yourself in your own head. You are your harshest critic. And no one is meaner to you than you are to yourself."
Okay, the conversation didn't go EXACTLY like that, but he did say all those things. Maybe over multiple sessions, maybe in the same session, I don't know. But he said them. And I'll never forget them. Because it was the moment I realized that I have never stopped doubting myself. Never stopped second-guessing every interaction, every decision I've ever made. It is the reason I push myself. Because I am not good enough for me. I'm not enough for the version of myself in my head. I'm not cool enough. Not successful enough. Not enough.
I took a practice interview. I'm honestly too scared to take a "scheduled" interview where it gives you feedback. I can't be "on" when the stakes aren't there. When there isn't a real person in front of me that I can play off of. I need that energy to see if they like what I am saying, to be sure that they like me. Most of the time in interviews I try to make some connection with the person I'm interviewing with so that they remember me. I comment on their t-shirt, talk about something in pop culture, anything to give them a hook. So that they don't remember me as "that nervous guy" but as the "game of thrones" guy.
That's probably a terrible tactic. But it's what I've got.
Frankly I need the practice. I need to take that little test.
Anyway, you asked for feedback:
For the resume part - I found the feedback repetitive. It took all the dashes I used and told me to change them all and so I had like 7 points of feedback that were all exactly the same. Aggregating those into one piece of feedback would be nice.
- The portal felt small, like there was too much information on the screen. You had a picture of my resume on one side, and then a list of changes to make on the other. Why not walk me through the resume and lead me to the changes? Point to them on the document. Have each one be a little dot or circle that I can click through and it shows them to me as I click on them instead of a list. Obviously the AI knows exactly where each change needs to be made. Make it more animated instead of a list. My brain doesn't want to try to make those connections. Make the machine do it.
The interview part:
- I didn't do the version where I got feedback, so I haven't had the full experience. But the practice questions were difficult. They felt real and I had zero idea how to answer, so in that sense it felt exactly like a real interview. What IS my greatest accomplishment? I know I said something, but I honestly have no idea. I guess I should figure it out. I wanted to say marrying my wife, but that sounded cliche. I didn't want the machine to judge me. Is that weird? I felt like some nerdy dude was going to read the transcript afterwards and then email me saying "marrying your wife? Really? That's all you've done with your life? What a loser." Even though I don't think I'm a loser. I was worried someone would think I was a loser. I don't know how that helps. But maybe telling people that no one will read the transcript. Even if its a lie. Just lie to me. Maybe. That's one person's opinion.
Overall I felt like the service was great. It worked well, and provided some actionable changes to my resume. I might not make them, but it was good to get the feedback for options for changes. This way I don't have to bother a mentor or a friend. I can just use a machine. Really helpful. Thanks!
I'm glad someone finally posted on this! I'm dreading the interview portion as well and was honestly wondering if I would be judged on how I dressed and presented myself visually. It's summer time so I'm not really "doing my hair" at the moment. Does the interview even use the camera? LOL.
ReplyDeleteSince you asked me not to, I will not tell you that you're great but I'm pretty sure most of us feel the same way. I'm told that I'm good with people in general but I also feel like I absolutely fail at interviews. I know I need to brag on my work accomplishments but it just doesn't feel authentic to me because I prefer to build others up.
My only suggestion is to own what you feel like you lack. I once had someone point out that my resume was basically a list of wildly varying skills that don't point to any one career path so I've taken to stating in interviews that "I know a lot about a lot but I am not an expert at anything." The companies that are seeking a Swiss army knife kind of person love this statement. The companies that need someone to do one thing well don't but I probably wouldn't be happy working for them anyway.
BTW, thanks for all of your posts on my blog! It was good to hear from you. :)
Thanks for this feedback on the platform. I really related to what you shared about how you seek to build rapport with the person(s) interviewing you and how that can help ease you into the experience. New tools like this one have the awe factor but I think there are some human components that are important and can get lost in our adoption of new technology. As someone who enjoys meeting and interacting with people the thought of this type of platform replacing interviews is unnerving - particularly because if interviews are supposed to go both ways it feels one sided.
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